The pool was loud in the way summer pools usually are — whistles, splashes, kids calling out to each other, coaches raising their voices above the noise, parents chatting on the sidelines. Our 7-year-old daughter stood at the edge, waiting for her instructor to guide her into the Olympic-sized pool.
HemoWife — Allyx Formalejo
Allyx Formalejo, or Cza, is a writer, entrepreneur, and digital marketer based in Marikina, Philippines. She is married to Jared, who has severe hemophilia B and a seizure disorder. They have a young daughter and two other “babies” — a dog and a cat. Cza herself is diagnosed with ADHD and bipolar II disorder. This allows her to offer a unique perspective on navigating various aspects of young adult life (e.g. relationships, career, and parenting) with chronic health conditions. In her free time, she enjoys collecting fountain pens, supporting small businesses, traveling across the country, and exploring local cafes. She continues to blog like most 90s kids did in the Internet’s early years, sharing her thoughts and interesting discoveries on her personal website, czaofalltrades.com.
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Sleep has always been a troublesome subject for me. Even as a child, it felt optional — something I could push aside in favor of thoughts, ideas, or whatever held my attention in the moment. In high school, that tendency only intensified. Sleep became negotiable, almost expendable, as if I…
A recent study found that people with hemophilia who report better mental health may be more likely to adhere to their prophylactic treatment. It’s a compelling idea — that mental well-being can influence how consistently someone follows a care plan. But as I read through it, I couldn’t…
One of the stranger skills I’ve developed in my marriage to someone with hemophilia isn’t medical — it’s domestic. It’s the art of removing blood stains. To be fair, I already had some experience dealing with blood simply by being a female person who menstruates. But when you’re married…
When people think about hemophilia, they usually think of joint, muscle, and sometimes soft-tissue bleeds. But one of the most dangerous complications occurs elsewhere: the brain. My husband, Jared, had a brain bleed as a child. It’s the kind of event people often imagine as…
Recently, news about a deal on airfare started making the rounds in our group chats. Here in the Philippines, these sales tend to appear when people start thinking about summer travel. Cheap fares, beautiful destinations, and the thrill of booking something spontaneous can be hard to resist. Some of my…
When my husband, Jared, has a hemophilia bleed, we know what to do. We immediately implement the RICE method of Rest, Ice, Compression, and Elevation. We also add to that list factor infusions and the monitoring of Jared’s condition. Hemophilia is complex, but there’s a strategy for managing it.
There’s something humbling about watching someone relearn how to walk. Not as a toddler, and not for the first time, but as an adult who already knows what walking used to feel like. My husband, Jared, has severe hemophilia B, and for years, his right ankle has been what’s…
When I was 3 years old, I joined a television pageant for little girls called “Princess Asia.” I won the top prize. But when I look back on that moment now, the crown itself feels almost incidental. What stands out more is that I caught amebiasis, an intestinal infection, just…
Hemophilia doesn’t just alter bodies and routines. Over time, it can also quietly shape expectations about who leads, who manages risk, and who carries responsibility. These expectations are rarely spoken out loud, but they’re powerful enough to follow people into adulthood, partnerships, and marriage. What complicates things is that…
For a long time, I didn’t think about exhaustion or how it would occasionally surface in my marriage to someone with hemophilia. As someone with attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), I tend to function well in high-pressure situations. Urgency sharpens me. When there’s a problem to solve or a…
I’ve written before about not seeing myself as a caregiver in the traditional sense. For us caregivers, hemophilia doesn’t usually demand round-the-clock care. My husband, Jared, manages his condition independently. He infuses. He monitors his body. He makes decisions about risk and rest. My role on most days is…
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