Valentine’s Day wishes for my sons with hemophilia

Valentine’s Day is a holiday that celebrates love. However, the day’s origin doesn’t involve a hard-to-get dinner reservation, the perfect Valentine’s card, and the best box of chocolates, but rather a martyred saint and a massacre. Fortunately, our 21st-century world has a more pleasant understanding of the day.

While this holiday celebrates romantic love, my earliest memories of Valentine’s Day date back to elementary school. The tiny, perforated cards bought at the grocery store measured the day. Each student would bring a shoebox and decorate it with colored construction paper, glue, and glittery hearts.

The nerve-racking part was walking around the room and sliding the small cards into the decorated boxes. Would I get cards from everyone? Would I get a card from the cute blond-haired, blue-eyed boy at my table? And if Sweethearts candies were included, what a bonus! It didn’t take much to make this second grade girl happy.

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Expressing my love for my sons

Decades later, my perspective on Valentine’s Day has changed. As a mom, it’s as if my heart has sprung legs and walks in the world. My sons, Julian, 28, and Caeleb, 19, are living with hemophilia. They’re adults carving out their paths in the world, yet they’ll always be my little boys.

To celebrate the day, I give them a sweet treat to remind them that they’re loved. This year, though, I dreamed about what I’d give my sons if money and possibilities were endless. My love for them is indescribable. I’d move mountains to help my sons in any way they might need.

My firstborn, Julian, is an actor and singer living the life of a starving artist. He spends his days submitting auditions nationwide, hoping to secure a performing contract. He’s happiest when singing on stage. His talent is tremendous, and any role that puts him in the spotlight creates magic.

If I could do anything for Julian, I’d get him a role on Broadway that would change his life. Not only would such a role showcase his remarkable talent, but it’d also affirm his path. To see him step into the spotlight in a packed theater and experience his dream coming to fruition would be one of the greatest gifts I could both give and receive.

As for Caeleb, my gift would be a little different. His journey has been shaped by years of bleeding into his right knee and ankle, which caused irreparable damage and pain that leaves him disabled. The pain he endures is constant and not easily alleviated by medication.

Caeleb is an ambulatory wheelchair user who sometimes uses a cane. At times, he must miss school because he’s hurting too much to think straight. Coming to terms with his disability has taken time, though Caeleb accepts his limits. But a young man should be focused on school and his impending career — not on chronic pain. Seeing him struggle is heartbreaking, so my wish for my youngest son is that I could take away his pain. Still, his resilience and determination inspire me every day.

Giving chocolates and cards is a sweet gesture, but I want to show my love in a more meaningful way. My deepest Valentine’s Day wishes for my sons are for them to live fulfilling lives that aren’t hindered by a bleeding disorder.

The true essence of love isn’t just celebrated on a holiday; it lasts a lifetime.

Note: Hemophilia News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or another qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Hemophilia News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to hemophilia.