The current state of our world has me longing for something. It’s something that when gone, nothing remains quite the same. What I long for is routine. Yes, I miss the humdrum and the mundaneness of routine. I can still count on some aspects of my life remaining steady, such…
Quarters. I ended up with a fistful of quarters the other day and had flashbacks to the early days of hemophilia. When my firstborn son came into the world, we lived in Houston. In the early days of Julian’s hemophilia diagnosis, trips to the Texas Medical Center were…
Sometimes I am overwhelmed when I think about the hemophilia journey my sons are traveling. My first memories about this date to June 1996, when my first son, Julian, was born and diagnosed with severe hemophilia A. The early days of learning how to access a port, and later,…
My chronic pain is not caused by a bleeding disorder, but it does give me perspective on the pain my youngest son, Caeleb, endures from hemophilia. Friends stopped by on a recent afternoon to meet our new puppies, and I shared a homemade pie that was fresh from the oven.
My 24-year-old son, Julian, lives out of state, where he attends college and works as a barista. He pays his bills and “adults” well, making me immensely proud of him. When he was a teenager, I didn’t think I would live to see his adult years. Like most teenagers who…
A new mom recently called me to share her concerns and to ask questions about choosing a new treatment for her son. She needed a listening ear, and just thinking about the possibility that her little boy might never need an implanted port gave me chills. I thought…
When I think back to the early days of raising my first of two sons with hemophilia, I see how I have changed. Back then, I was a scared young woman trying to figure out what the diagnosis of a rare medical condition meant. I found myself living…
The back-to-school season is one of my favorites. Shopping for new school clothes, finding the right backpack, and getting school supplies are part of the tradition. As my son Caeleb enters his freshman year of high school, it looks to be the start of a vastly different year. There is…
A couple friends came over for lunch last weekend, and one started talking to my youngest son, Caeleb, who is 14. Caeleb and I were both confused by this, because the conversation didn’t make sense. I realized that my friend had mistaken Caeleb for my older son Julian, who is…
When people find out my sons have hemophilia, their reactions often make me uncomfortable. “You are so brave, Cazandra,” one might say. “I don’t know if I could do it,” another might add. Friends and family members often place me on a pedestal by saying that my strength and courage…
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