Receiving Support From Others Is a Gift of Grace
I consider myself a high-functioning adult. Living with depression, anxiety, and chronic pain brings quite a few challenges, yet I manage to keep moving. Add my son Caeleb’s bleeding disorder, and life can prove interesting. While managing our chronic conditions, I find that I rarely ask for help.
When Caeleb was spending time in the hospital, times that seemed never to end, friends and church family would step up to help my family. At the time, I was the pastor’s wife, and receiving help made me feel like a failure. I thought I was a strong woman who could handle anything thrown at her. Caring for my family, home, and work shouldn’t have been an issue. But it turned out all these responsibilities were often challenging to fulfill.
Through the help of others, I learned more about the gift of grace. Every meal that was prepared and dropped at my doorstep, every ride given to my oldest son, Julian, to and from school, every visit from friends at the hospital that allowed my husband and I to take a break and leave for a bite to eat — all were moments of grace.
These moments allowed people the opportunity to help in a way they could offer. So often, people are at a loss when someone they love is hurting. They want to help and do what they can. Who am I to refuse? If I don’t allow others to contribute their time, food, or transportation, I’m turning my back on their gift.
Initially, I wanted to write thank-you notes or return the favors, but it was impossible. There were too many offerings, many given without a name attached, for me to keep up with. Therein lies the gift of grace: It’s a gift that isn’t intended to be returned.
However, when someone is in need, I’m the first to offer a helping hand, despite my list of things that must be done. Many would never know I need help. I would rather offer an extra hand than receive comfort and support from others.
It’s OK to allow space for people to offer their help. In my experience, support always comes at just the right time. Instead of telling people I’m fine amid apparent struggle, I open the door for grace.
Letting others help is not a sign of weakness. On the contrary, it’s a sign of strength. When a person allows others to step in and help, it gives people the ability to support their friends. The person receiving the help only gets stronger.
Note: Hemophilia News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or another qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Hemophilia News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to hemophilia.
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