An evening for every woman who’s ever wondered if her bleeding was normal
Girls Bleed Too will host a free screening of 'Dismissed' on Oct. 8
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For the past week, my inbox has been filling with the same notification: Someone new has registered for “Dismissed.”
I read every one. Some names I know, the advocates and friends who’ve sat beside me at conferences for years. Most I don’t. Those are the ones I think about.
A stranger registering for a film called “Dismissed” is quietly admitting something — maybe for the first time: that she was told her bleeding was normal and she never quite believed it.
The story most of us share
Most of us have a version of the same story. You say something isn’t right. You’re told it’s normal. You go home. Tears flow. You keep going. Years pass before anyone looks closer.
I was diagnosed with hemophilia B and von Willebrand disease in 1975, when I was a child. Even with those diagnoses, I spent years hearing that heavy periods were just heavy periods and that tired was just tired. A diagnosis didn’t guarantee anyone would take me seriously. It just meant the dismissal came with a chart attached.
“Dismissed” is a 40-minute documentary that follows women and girls with bleeding disorders through what it takes to be believed. The delayed diagnoses. The appointments that found nothing. The years of being told this is just how periods are. If you’ve lived it, you’ll recognize it. If you love someone who has, you’ll understand her better afterward.
Two women, two generations
On Wednesday, Oct. 8, at 8 p.m. ET, Girls Bleed Too, the advocacy platform I founded for women and girls with bleeding disorders, is hosting a free online screening. Afterward, two women featured in the film, Isabelle Capsel and Kim Hernandez, will join us live for a conversation and open Q&A. I’ve written about both of them. Seeing them side by side is what stays with me.
Kim grew up watching her father live with severe hemophilia. When she was tested, her factor level landed just above the cutoff, and she was labeled a carrier. Before a routine knee procedure, she told her surgical team about her bleeding history and asked them to bring in a hematologist. They moved forward without one. A minor repair became a ruptured pseudoaneurysm, a 12-hour emergency surgery, and weeks in the hospital.
Isabelle was diagnosed with hemophilia B at 18 months. She was 15 when she filmed “Dismissed,” the youngest voice in it. She has said her generation gets doctors who are finally willing to prove women have bleeding disorders.
Kim shows what happens when the warning is there and nobody listens. Isabelle shows what’s possible when someone does. The distance between them is the whole argument of the film.
Built for the woman who isn’t sure yet
We designed the evening with one person in mind: the woman who has never said any of this out loud.
The whole event runs about 90 minutes. Cameras and microphones can stay off the entire time. You can watch from your couch with the lights off if that’s what you need.
You don’t need a diagnosis to come. If you’ve been told your bleeding is normal and you’re not sure it is, this is for you. If you’re a parent wondering about your daughter, this is for you. Partners, husbands, and fathers: The women in your life have been navigating this for years, and this is a good way to understand it. Providers and advocates are welcome, too.
Can’t make it at 8? Register anyway. Everyone who signs up will receive the replay.
Being believed starts somewhere
Isabelle and Kim will answer anything you want to ask, and that alone is worth an evening. There aren’t many places where you can ask a woman who has lived this, “How did you finally get someone to listen?”
But the most useful thing you can do might happen before Oct. 8.
Think of the woman in your life who plans around her period. The one who bruises and laughs it off. The one who was told “It’s just how you are” so many times that she stopped bringing it up. Send her this column.
For many of us, being believed didn’t start with a doctor. It started with one person who said, “I don’t think that’s normal. You should look into it.” Be that person for someone.
Registration for “Dismissed”: A Film Screening + Conversation is free at girlsbleedtoo.org/events.
Note: Hemophilia News Today is strictly a news and information website about the disease. It does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. This content is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult your physician or another qualified healthcare provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. Never disregard professional medical advice or delay in seeking it because of something you have read on this website. The opinions expressed in this column are not those of Hemophilia News Today or its parent company, Bionews, and are intended to spark discussion about issues pertaining to hemophilia.
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